Why I Am Just a Perfectly “Imperfect” Mum.

Why I Am Just a Perfectly “Imperfect” Mum.

I wanted to be the perfect mum. Which woman doesn’t, right?

 

 

Now I don’t think of my self as a perfect mum, rather as a perfectly “Imperfect” one, and that is how I came to this conclusion:

Five and a half years ago my man looked at me in the eyes, (he has charming blue eyes…yes he is hot!) and said: “Sweetie, let’s have a baby”.

A baby???

Now, we were still living in two different places, as in: NOT together, in-between jobs, neither of us had a secure and stable financial situation yet, I was about to be kicked out of my apartment which had been put up for sale…so of course I replied YES! Straightaway, on the spot. Blame the blue eyes, that perfectly sweet smile of his or the sweetness in his voice if you may, but that was my answer. And let’s not forget, I was completely and utterly in love with him, already.A few months later, I was expecting my first baby.

Since the day I discovered I was pregnant, I immediately started fantasising about my future life, adding to it more and more details and colours every day, until it became this picture perfect that you see only in movies. YES, I was striving for PERFECTION even before my baby was born. In my head, this little bundle of joy would be smiling a lot, sleep when I wanted him to, wake up and smile a bit more. I of course, would always be calm and sweet even when faced with tiredness and sleep deprivation.
THAT was my PLAN. I was going to be the best mum ever, the one others look up to for advice, the perfect mum.
As you probably guessed by now, I was entering the fascinating realm of motherhood without really knowing much about it. And when imaging my life like in the movies, I kind of forgot that on the big screen, days, week and years are summarised in a couple of hours, whereas in real life you have to live them second by second. Furthermore, in real life you don’t have time for rehearsal.
Needless to say, I soon found out that MOTHER and PERFECTION do not really go together. The baby was behaving…well as babies do. The house was chaotic, messy, and noisy, but full of LOVE… and little by little, I started to realise that when your child is loved, there is not really a RIGHT or a WRONG way to be a mum. I finally started to comprehend that, that roller coaster of emotions I was experiencing and the stress, the frustration, the happiness, the chaos and craziness, were in fact: NORMAL. All that I was living was the NORM, not the EXCEPTION!
That is when I accepted that I was never going to be the “perfect” mum in my head, but I would most certainly give my all, to be a “dam good one”!
 
<MsW>
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